tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-60727053317628749002024-03-14T02:41:09.211-04:00Mystic CroneThe time has come for me to speak from the heart of a Mystic Crone. I am a vessel of the Divine and as such I understand when She asks me to speak words of Truth and Love. This may not be Your Truth but it is the Truth that lies in this Mystic Crone's heart. By sharing my heart and thoughts I hope you will get to know me better but also see that the Divine speaks to you also and asks that you speak that Truth in Love and Light! Come join me on this journey! Blessed be!Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.comBlogger181125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-64797063762350709512017-10-26T13:40:00.002-04:002017-10-26T13:40:57.719-04:00Sister Sun Slept<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Once Upon a Time Sister Sun Overslept.<br />
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It's hard Rising and Setting every day. It's rough Climbing high in the Sky pouring Energy out to all the Planets.<br />
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Earth is the most Demanding of all the Children of the Sun.<br />
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The Plants need Her to Grow. People need Her Vitamin D and that great Summer Tan.<br />
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Even the Rain requires that She cause Evaporation so the Cycle can be complete.<br />
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So one day, Sister Sun Overslept!<br />
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She really didn't mean to! She knows Her Importance. But doesn't a Gal get to Sleep In every now and then?<br />
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What's the worse that can happen?<br />
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So Once a Time, She did just that! She hit the Snooze button, Rolled over, and Covered Her head with Her Quilt!<br />
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The Birds stayed Silent, confused by it all!<br />
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Morning Glories stayed closed.<br />
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And Grandmother Moon didn't know if She was to keep Moving or Not?<br />
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Once Upon a Time, Sister Sun Overslept.<br />
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Her Children became restless. They didn't know what to do. They had Things to do and the Sun Sleeping was most inconvenient.<br />
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So they Screamed and Yelled and Stomped their Feet. Her Children threw one big Temper Tantrum.<br />
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So much for Oversleeping!<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-52887860557464959502017-10-26T12:57:00.000-04:002017-10-26T12:57:13.586-04:00Single Threads of Gold<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Single Threads of Gold poured from the crevices of Her Heart.<br />
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Never had She felt so Complete and Happy!<br />
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He had come into Her Life!<br />
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Right there Sitting in the Lifeguard Chair was her Adonis. Her God!<br />
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They Met, they Dated, they held Tightly to each other as they Floated after hours, in the cool Waters of the Swimming Pool.<br />
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There in the Lifeguard Chair sat Her God, her Lover, her One!<br />
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She was so sure he was the One, she didn't notice the first Tugs on the Golden Threads cascading from her Heart!<br />
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The Journey became less about Love and Play and Floating Together. The Journey became all about the Golden Threads. The Journey became all about Adonis using the Golden Threads to Control and eventually Strangle this Woman who had Fallen desperately in Love with The Man in the Lifeguard Chair.<br />
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Sometimes we Choose the Lifeguard, convinced he will save us from Ourselves.<br />
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Sometimes we Confuse Love and Control and let Another use our Golden Threads to Silence our Voice.<br />
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Once Upon a Time, she Gathered the few Remaining Threads not Bound around her Throat and Walked Away from the God of the Lifeguard Chair.<br />
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Slowly, the Golden Threads Unwound and once again Flowed gently from her Heart.<br />
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She Sang the Song of Guarding Her Golden Threads!<br />
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Once Upon a Time......<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-58782374375178607422017-10-25T11:36:00.002-04:002017-10-25T11:36:31.022-04:00The Ruby Slippers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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She Promised that the Ruby Red Slippers would take her Home. "Click three times" said the Fairy Goddess Mother.<br />
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The Woman stood still.<br />
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"Click your Shoes so You can Return Home." Fairy Goddess Mother insisted.<br />
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But what if I don't Want to go Home, she thought?<br />
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What if the Colorless World awaiting me is not one that I Want?<br />
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"But you Have to Go Home!" said the Fairy Goddess Mother. "You Must! You have no Choice!"<br />
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"I have NO CHOICE?" the Woman said. "Really? Don't you see: I CAN CHOOSE NOT to click my Ruby Red Slippers! I HAVE CHOICE!"<br />
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Fairy Goddess Mother was dumbfounded.<br />
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"But people are Waiting for you! People Depend on you, Need you, have Expectations of you! You MUST GO HOME!"<br />
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The Woman thought about it and <br />
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Gently reached Down and Removed her Red Ruby Slippers.<br />
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"No Thank You! I Choose Not to go Home."<br />
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"I Need Me! I Want Me!"<br />
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"I have been Waiting for Me!"<br />
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And so, the Fairy Goddess Mother, took the Red Ruby Slippers.<br />
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The Woman turned and put one Bare Foot in front of the other. Each Foot taking a Step was a Choice in and of Itself!<br />
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Fairy Goddess Mother smiled!<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-50595848383653693292017-10-25T11:08:00.000-04:002017-10-25T11:08:16.124-04:00The Invisible WomanShe sat at her window seat Once Upon a Time.<br />
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This Window Seat had become the Lens she looked through into a World passing her by.<br />
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No one stopped to Wave.<br />
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No one paused to Smile.<br />
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No one noticed her sitting at her Window Seat.<br />
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And yet she sat Waiting.<br />
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Waiting for someone to Notice her.<br />
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This, The Invisible Woman!<br />
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No one Noticed her in Elementary school when she fell off the Teeter Totter.<br />
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They Laughed.<br />
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No one noticed her in college as she lay on the couch Sobbing after being raped by three fraternity brothers.<br />
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No one noticed her as she tried to hide the Bruises graciously awarded her for Burning the morning Toast.<br />
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No one noticed her when she was left for Dead by the man who promised to love her, 'til death does us part.'<br />
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This The Invisible Woman!<br />
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At her Window Seat, she Gazes through the Lens of Hope and Survival.<br />
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This, the Invisible Woman, sits at her Window Seat, Gazing at the World.<br />
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Waiting to be Noticed.<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-6526090004739890182017-09-19T11:16:00.000-04:002017-09-20T19:19:41.034-04:00Saying Goodbye to Persephone: Mabon arrives! <div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" id="js_9">
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Good
and gracious Tuesday! We move toward Mabon this week and as such we
begin to say good bye to Persephone! I do not accept the patriarchal
rewriting of Her Story where She is stolen away by Hades, raped and kept
captive. No, I accept the original story where Persephone makes the
decision to leave the care of Her mother, Demeter, to care for the
Underworld for 6 months.<br />
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We have a lot to learn from this story
and I think it may be why this time of year is always different for me. I
was married in the Fall. Both my miscarriages happened in the Fall, I
returned to work after the birth of both my children, in the Fall. Then
my children went to public school and then college, in the Fall. And I
ended my 30 year marriage in the Fall.<br />
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Persephone stands for me: Major Transitions.<br />
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It is necessary that Persephone leaves Her mother, Demeter. And as we
all do, during major transitions, we grieve. Demeter grieved so much
that even when Hecate came to minister to Demeter and assured Her that
Her daughter was ok; Demeter still was so sad that the Garden rested and
went barren.<br />
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One of the major gifts of aging is the ability to
look back and see how life unfolded and have faith that it will continue
to unfold for our highest good! I learn a lot in the Fall. I learn
about being quiet, about what harvest looks like in my life and the life
of others. I learn about sharing what I have with others and I learn to
be a gracious receiver when I am in need of something from someone
else. <br />
I am drawn to going within and "licking my wounds", of
acknowledging what has died and what I need to let die! Patricia
Monaghan says in her book: Seasons of the Witch: "This is the time to
decide what will die. Not all of last spring's calves and lambs and
ducklings can be fed through the winter. Some will die, and in the dying
provide food. It is a season of decisions. And of prophecies: for as
other life dies, it foreshadows our own deaths.... As she moves through
autumn, a woman.... does not try to nurture everything and everyone, for
she knows not all can---should----survive. She becomes selective. There
is enough of everything---strength, love, passion, lust---everything
but time." <br />
Persephone leaving Her mother, had Demeter realize that. What would it look like if we followed suit.<br />
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We know that Persephone will return to Demeter and to us bringing
flowers, vegetation, and all that grows to nourish and sustain us. That
is Hope. But what about those who have lost that hope? That seem to be
my challenge in the Fall and Winter.<br />
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The answer is we share from
our Harvest! We each have something to bring to the Table. It may not
be actual food and water, but it may be compassion, understanding, a
sweet and unexpected note, or a message of "I get it and I care."<br />
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Mabon will arrive without a fanfare, without fireworks and without
front page news, but come She will. She will come in Silence. Soon,
Persephone will be deep within the Cave and before we know it, our fires
will be lit, the harvest will be over and we will be cuddled up on our
chairs with hot cocoa and a good book!<br />
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May we all be aware of
the Silence, of the need and the want and the deep stirrings in our soul
of what it means to be without Persephone for the next 6 months!<br />
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Blessed be and So mote it be!<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-27942274534395912052016-11-20T14:46:00.002-05:002016-11-20T14:46:16.436-05:00Wear the World like a Loose Garment!I have never ever liked tight clothing and I still don't.<br />
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I feel smothered and restrained and if it is two things I despise they are not being able to Breathe and being restrained! Or maybe you haven't noticed!<br />
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So today as I was listening to a recording, the woman said these words that were really not the point of the teaching but made everything else she said disappear from my thought processes. I guess I will have to go back and listen to that recording again sometime.<br />
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She said, "We are to wear the world like a loose garment!"<br />
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What would it look like, I wonder, if we all wore the world like a loose garment. You know a garment that only touches us in certain places... those places we desire them to touch. Yes, we want pants to fit around our waist so they don't fall off, but does that mean we pull the belt so tight that we can hardly breathe? And is that about not wanting the pants to fall off or is there another meaning to be gleaned there?<br />
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Yes we want our shirts to hold on to our shoulders so they won't fall away either, but what happens when that strap has to be so tight that it causes a mark on our shoulder? Or how about the shoes we wear that hurt our feet but we wear them because they make our legs "sexy"? We could go on and on you see!<br />
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Most of us take personally, what is happening in the world, especially since the last presidential election. So that, no matter who won, we take it personally and the garment of the Election begins to make us so uncomfortable (like those too tight shoes) we become irritable, angry and down right mean!<br />
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Our family drama... and yes, that is personal.... begins to strangle us like a scarf tied too tight to keep out the cold.<br />
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And we can't breathe.<br />
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What would it look like if we Wore the World like a Loose Garment?<br />
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I imagine it would make me feel free and light. It would not make the World go away, it would make me less restrained and bothered by that which causes me to be irritable, angry and mean. It would hang on me like my Goddess cloak hung on me during my Croning Ceremony. I could barely feel Her on me and as such I felt Powerful, Empowered, and Authentic to accept the anointing and also then be free to decide what this meant for my ongoing Journey. How would I stand in my Croneship? How would I treat others? How would I live a life standing in my Truth and Wisdom?<br />
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If that cloak had been tight, I would have spent more time adjusting and fidgeting and would have been distracted and ultimately irritated and angry. That would have ruined the Journey for me.<br />
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So I choose... yes it is a choice.... I choose to wear the world like a loose garment; only touching me where I need and want it to touch me. Notice, this does not mean I choose not wear the world at all. Oh my goddess.... that is not possible and most certainly not wise. The point is I will choose how it touches me and hangs on me. I want the world to hang on me in the same Divine Fashion that the Goddess Cloak hangs on me. <br />
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I choose to Wear the World in a way that gives me pause to Breathe and Reflect so I can make decisions from a Divinely inspired place and not a place of irritation, anger and meanness!<br />
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I want the World Garment to touch me in my Heart and Soul for those who are marginalized, hungry, abused, neglected, discriminated against, and for women's right to choose. For others, they will choose for the Garment to touch them in different places. But for all of us, the garment that hangs loosely allows space to Breathe, to Speak, to Listen, to Pause, and to Act! <br />
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What pieces of clothing need adjusting in your life? Is there a way you can loosen the belt, scarf or buy a different pair of shoes?<br />
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A loose garment allows me to flow through the tough times, allows me to twirl in celebration and to spread my "wings" when I need to go into battle!<br />
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I choose to Wear the World like a Loose Garment! Want to join me?<br />
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Blessed be!<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-18906310994416569282016-11-19T11:58:00.000-05:002016-11-19T11:58:41.088-05:00What happens in the Pause? For the past few months, I have listened as my Gentle Flow Yogi, Brenda, reminds us to Pause before taking the next Breath. Just a second or two, but to Pause. It is interesting how just a second or two Pause makes me feel like I am smothering. But yet, today, I finally GOT IT!<br />
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Today, I sat in the Pause.<br />
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Today, only for the second or two there, I soaked in the Quiet, the Stillness, the.... Pause!<br />
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The Pause from thinking about the next breath!<br />
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The Pause from thinking about the next Pose or the next Thought!<br />
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Pause!<br />
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In this fast paced life we now Journey through, there are seldom Pauses! We rush from one thought to the other, one thing to the other, one person, event, relationship to the other.<br />
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And we wonder why we are always Tired.<br />
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Now, I won't be intentionally Pausing between Breaths as I go through my day, but this is what I gleaned this morning.<br />
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It is important to Pause between the things on our list, the thoughts going through our head and even the channels as we cruise through the remote!<br />
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If we would, I do believe we would find ourselves in a much different place. A place of Quiet and Stillness and even Void!<br />
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A lot happens in those 1-2 seconds. I did not suffocate. I did not panic or even die.<br />
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What I did do was experience the Divine in a new way and in a new place..... INSIDE ME!<br />
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That is where the Pause exists!<br />
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Come with me and find the Pause! As you are rushing through your day, intentionally Pause before getting out of the car at your next stop. Pause before answering the phone or sending the text. Pause before selecting your words during a confrontation or even a moment of tenderness.<br />
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Pause so you don't miss the Rainbow, the cloud formation or what Moon Phase is shining in the nighttime sky! Pause to actually taste the coffee or the sandwich you are swallowing whole to get to the next appointment.<br />
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Pause to give thanks! Pause to give or receive a compliment! Pause to laugh and pause to cry!<br />
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Just Pause!<br />
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You will be glad you did!<br />
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Blessed be!<br />
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<br />Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-36074171369001666872016-11-08T09:42:00.002-05:002016-11-08T09:42:56.630-05:00I walked with the Suffragettes! <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I have been able to vote since I was 18 years old. I have never taken it for granted. Every time I vote I say thank you to all those brave warrior women we call Suffragettes who made it possible for me to make a decision and cast my vote.<br />
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This morning was different tho'. Luckily, I do not have to drive to my polling place. It is held in a small church on the main road right at the entrance to my apartment complex.<br />
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So, I got up early, bundled up as it was 37 degrees outside, chose one of my Goddess figurines from <br />Brigids Grove (https://www.etsy.com/shop/BrigidsGrove) and began my walk. Maybe it is because the Veil is still thin from Samhain, but whatever.... all of a sudden, I was with the Suffragettes! They were all around me... marching to the Polling Center. I stood tall and regal and walked slowly breathing in all that happened prior to the 1920 ratification of the 19th amendment and afterwards! Breathing in those Women who were put in prison, who were beaten and abused, who were demeaned and lost family support. Breathing in the brilliant choices of those such as Susan B Anthony and Elizabeth Cady Stanton.<br />
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I walked with my head held high this morning with the Spirit of all those women who made it possible for me to vote in this country.<br />
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But today was different in another way. I was voting for a Woman to be President of the United States of America.<br />
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There are many who have accused me of voting for Hillary Clinton JUST BECAUSE she is a woman. Well, yes, her being a Woman is incredible, but let it be said, when Sarah Palin was running as Vice President, I did not hop on her bandwagon JUST BECAUSE she was a woman. There was no way, I would vote for anyone like her, woman or not... thus why I am not voting for Donald Trump.<br />
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I have "followed" Hillary Clinton since the early 80's. I respected her Voice for Women and Children, for her Activism and for her political decisions. I was thrilled when she became First Lady and then Secretary of State and Senator. She is an intelligent, compassionate, forward thinking, political savvy woman!<br />
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Does she still have one foot in the Patriarchal Mind Set? Yes! But you cannot get things done without understanding the abuses of power and control, the misogynistic, bigoted mind set, and you cannot understand how to "work the system" if you are not first a part of it in some way. It is women like Susan B Anthony who "worked the system" to finally achieve something she did not live to be able to take part in. She died before the ratification, but had left other women to continue the fight and finally win.<br />
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Hillary Clinton has to swim in those waters so her voice will be heard. This is the way changes will happen, with a Woman at the helm. <br />
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But she cannot and will not be able to do it alone. She will have a hard road ahead of her, as did President Obama, but she also has a shit load of Women surrounding her.<br />
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Like Susan B Anthony, who did hard work, suffered for it, and raised the awareness of other Women to continue the fight! We must continue this work. We cannot be Silent when the Election is over!<br />
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So, there I was surrounded by men and women (some with their children just like I use to do), all ages, races and stories. There I was surrounded by people in work clothes, some like me in my walking clothes and some in their Sports shirts. There were many holding coffee cups and lots on their phones. And yet, for me.... I was surrounded by All the Women who came before me so I could be standing in that line...knowing who I would be voting for and not worrying about who anyone else was voting for.<br />
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It was just me, Goddess and the Suffragettes. <br />
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And I voted with Goddess in my hand! I voted with a smile on my face! And as I walked home I cried! <br />
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I voted!!!! It is a good day!<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-20295276871432476442016-09-26T08:43:00.000-04:002016-09-26T19:00:42.732-04:00Name change update!<br />
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This Black Moon has been powerful for me. It is bringing change and transformation. I am feeling it in my Deep Soul work.<br />
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Of course, having Aquarius Rising Sun does not help! I tend to become restless when I am not being challenged or finding my Present stimulating and challenging. I travel the past and the future very well, but have a hard time staying in the Present.<br />
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That being said! I am ready to begin the process of legally changing my name as I wrote in my last blog post. BUT, will sit with it until the first of the year! (If I can stand it!)<br />
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I am blessed with a most insightful and intelligent daughter. She called me last night after she finished work (11:30pm) and we talked until the wee hours of the morning about many things, but mainly my desire to change my name.<br />
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She asked questions that made me really think about why this has become important to me and then made a most amazing suggestion.<br />
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It concerned her that I was going to just be Angelique Autumn. She really felt like there needed to be a "last name." She had listened to the story I talked about in the last blog post.<br />
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This is what she said: "Mom, you keep talking about that you wish Grandma had used the name McGowan too in your name. That sounds very Celtic and also quite pagan. What do you think of Angelique Autumn McGowan!"<br />
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I was stopped in my tracks.<br />
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That was it! That was the missing piece!<br />
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So, I went to my ancestry chart to make sure I was spelling McGowan right as Stephanie began researching meanings, family crests, etc.<br />
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Now, there are 2 Rebecca's in my ancestor tree. I thought the maternal Rebecca was indeed the McGowan. NOPE.... my maternal Grandfather's mother is Rebecca McGowan. Her father is Daniel who came directly from Ireland.<br />
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I took pause as I am sure you can see where I immediately went: oh crap.... this is from my mom's paternal tree, but then realized that the name is still from the maternal side of the lake! whew! haha!<br />
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Stephanie and I had a blast reading about the family crests and coat of arms. The name derives from "son of the blacksmith". The crest has the Lion and the Boar (both in my animal pantheon). The meanings of the symbols on the crest are full of community, peace and protection messages.<br />
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So there you have it: one day I will indeed bear the name:<br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><i><b>Angelique Autumn McGowan</b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><i><b>Yep, me and the Witch Angelique do look a lot alike! </b></i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><i><b>I think it is time! </b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><i><b>Peace out! </b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><i><b> </b></i></span> <br />
<br />Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-41163721835303721182016-09-25T09:56:00.000-04:002016-09-25T09:56:25.554-04:00Changing my name legally and the interesting thoughts insuing! <br />
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I want to legally change my name!<br />
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It has been heavy on my heart of late and has been for quite awhile.<br />
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Of course, I have changed my last name twice! I couldn't wait to get married so I could change my last name. It still makes me laugh, because I was a feminist even then, who never wanted to take the last name of my husband, but I wanted to get so far away from my maiden name that I was willing to do so.<br />
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Then when I got divorced, I couldn't wait to get rid of the married name and took back my maiden name. Upon telling the ex to expect the name change in the divorce papers I was filing, he said, "Good, my last name is too good for you!" Whatever asshole!<br />
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This week, I began looking into the legal process of changing my entire name.<br />
I then reacquainted myself with everything I would have to do to change my name on all the legal paperwork; birth certificate, social security, credit cards, medical, etc. What I wasn't prepared for was the next thoughts:<br />
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1. This would upset my parents cause they put a lot of thought into naming me. (well really, my mom wanted to name me Angelique Rebecca, but dad said NO, and as a result I was named after Debra Padgett, the actress, along with a million other 1952 girls!)<br />
2. Do I just let those who have known me as Debbie my whole life continue to call me that or do I insist they call me by my new name?<br />
3. Will this cause issues in my parent's will?<br />
4. Why do I care?<br />
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Why do I care? Why do I care what my name is? Does it define me? Am I really that pissed at my family of origin that I want to rid myself of the name given to me at birth?<br />
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My mother wanted to name me Angelique. I did not know this until I wanted to name my daughter Angelique and the husband/father would not allow it. The interesting thing is: the first time I ever heard this name was in Dark Shadows! I was totally enthralled with the Witch Angelique and dreamed of being her, having her name, and her powers! To this day, she "haunts" me with those beautiful eyes! I was already wearing my eye make up like hers before this show even came on!<br />
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During a Reike session in Virginia, without knowing all this name history stuff, the master said, "Your higher spirit was present today, she hovered over your Crown Chakra. Does the name Angelique mean anything to you?" I was astounded and told her the Story!<br />
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I want to legally change my name:<br />
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I want to legally change my name to Angelique Autumn!<br />
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I guess for legal purposes it would be Angelique as my first name and Autumn as my last. I do not want to be Angelique Autumn Hillman!<br />
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I want my own name that I think I was always meant to have. Sunshine Fae is my witchy name and it describes me to a tee, but there is something that calls to me in a Deep Soul way, saying Angelique Autumn is MY name. It is the name I should have had all along!<br />
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So, that is my current dilemma.<br />
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The next chapter to be written sooner than later!<br />
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Blessed be!<br />
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<br />Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-21553523187556780572016-09-20T09:17:00.000-04:002016-09-20T09:17:15.715-04:00The Peaceful Dragon<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I have been in a time of Deep Soul Work of late. As I look back over my life journey, I seem to do this work as Mabon approaches. This time has been life altering and revealing in a most significant way. The revelations will have to wait as they are still bubbling away in the Cauldron, but I do want to share my experience from last night.<br />
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I have decided that it is time for me to take Tai Chi and/or Yoga. I am finding it so difficult to center and as I age I want to regain the flexibility I have lost. I often drive by a place called: The Peaceful Dragon and decided to call them yesterday. The woman I spoke with told me they offer Tai Chi, Yoga and the Martial Arts. Their classes are based on Ancient Oriental spirituality and technique. She set me up for a tour and a free class last night.<br />
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Here is my experience.<br />
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The building is set on 12 acres of wooded land and has an outside sense of peace and tranquility; flowing waterfall into a beautiful pond with Koi and water lilies. As I opened the large door a sign said: "Welcome to The Peaceful Dragon Deb Hillman!" There was green tea beside a wooden bench in front of the front desk. A huge Buddha sat beside the bench along with beautiful Oriental ornamental wall hangings, etc.<br />
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Peaceful dragon it was not!<br />
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A kid's Kung Fu class was going on in the large room and many parents were sitting and standing talking loudly. A man approached me and begin talking about the Libertarian Candidate and how horrible Hillary is and how he will vote for Trump. I quietly walked away.<br />
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I passed a room with a large sign saying "LEAVE SWORDS OUTSIDE!"<br />
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Finally, George, one of the instructors, took me into a very small room and began the "interview" process. They hand select who can come into this school.We talked about why I want Tai Chi and Yoga and my past and present experiences with martial arts. I did a lot of listening as he did A LOT of talking about the Chinese philosophy of preparing for battle. He gave me history and rationale for why it is important for us to be "prepared". I kept thinking, "wait... I wanted to learn to center and be flexible".<br />
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With all this being said, the free class I was taking, was George showing me two Tai Chi poses and having me do them a few times. He then told me that I would take 2 Tai Chi classes a week and could take up to 4 Yoga classes for the cost of $200 a month for 1 year. I had to sign a year contract which had no way to get out of it, as this is a school. There is required clothing and also periodic tests to see if I could advance to the next level.<br />
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Holy shit.... All I wanted to do was run out! There was no sense of peaceful anything. There was only the Patriarch Mind Set of Battle, Testing, and lots of money. The noise in the facility was incredible.<br />
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I guess I just have a different idea of someplace called Peaceful Dragon. This is a wonderful place I am sure and the classes may be in fact peaceful when they aren't throwing swords, etc. But it is not for me.<br />
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So, I stopped by the local YMCA and got a free week to try their yoga classes. Then I will get a Tai Chi DVD and watch it on my new Smart TV.<br />
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As I was reflecting on the "dad" approaching me to trash Hilary, I began to laugh: oh what a sense of humor the Universe has! Ok, so I get it... I am not suppose to be here, but really???? I didn't even have my I hate Trump shirt on! I didn't wear my Fuck Patriarchy Tank Top! It was just me and my simple shorts and top!<br />
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Peaceful Dragon..... what ever! maybe there isn't any such thing!<br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-36605793505023142352016-09-12T08:15:00.001-04:002016-09-12T08:22:52.561-04:00The Flag, Anthem and other Reflections! <br />
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For those who follow me and know me, you are aware that this is an eclectic blog. One time, I will pen a post about a beautiful Goddess, another time I will talk about my past and then other times I will be angry and opinionated. Oh wait... I am ALWAYS opinionated!<br />
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It is what I love about blogging.<br />
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This blog will not be a welcome read for many I am sure and I almost didn't write it. But when something won't leave me alone, I pay attention in my old age!<br />
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I am a 60's kid! I marched against the Establishment, for civil rights, and battled with Religion. It is in my blood to speak to that which touches my heart and stirs my soul. No where did a Flag or an anthem cause me to do so. I rallied behind the idea that all should be treated equally and fairly. I did so in peaceful protest, never violent ones. <br />
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In 1968 the world was appalled when American Olympic metal winners, held up their fists to silently declare: "This was a way of saying, at the end of the 1960s ... that the
African-Americans had had enough of domestic racism and that here was an
opportunity to express their feelings about that.”<br />
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The world did not end and racism did not stop, but more dialogue about racism began. This country then moved on to something else.<br />
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Lately, an NFL football player did not stand for the National Anthem. It became a national issue, with people threatening to kill him, to stop supporting the NFL, and to bash anyone who in this Democracy DARES to demonstrate in any way, much less in a Silent protest on National TV. What I heard was, "hey, he should be thankful to live in a Democracy where he can make millions of dollars, and live in a nice house. How can he do that? He needs to respect the anthem and flag cause lots of people died to make this country where he can have all these privileges."Yep... Democracy at it's best, right? You are not allowed to have a silent protest cause it means you are dissing America. If you believe this then you don't understand Democracy. <br />
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Here is where I stand on the issue of Flags, Anthems, and yearly remembrances of violence, torture and war.<br />
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I am happy to be an American. On most days, I am thankful and proud to live in this country. I am grateful for all the opportunities I have been given and long for those yet to be achieved (ERA, civil rights, etc).<br />
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That being said, I do not stand for the anthem and I do not pledge allegiance to a Flag. I do not pledge allegiance to anything but caring for my neighbor and being a Voice for those without a Voice.<br />
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Definition of allegiance: <span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">loyalty or commitment of a subordinate to a superior or of an individual to a group or cause.</span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">A flag for any country is just a piece of material that has been designed as a symbol for said country. It is mostly a piece of material to separate and divide, to rally the forces, and to hang at half mast for those deemed worthy of such an act. What is has become is a god! </span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">The anthem speaks of war and is another example of stirring up the masses to remember how "we" beat up others in order to have democracy. </span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">Oh, say, can you see, by the dawn's early light,<br />
What so proudly we hail'd at the twilight's last gleaming?<br />
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro' the perilous fight,<br />
O'er the ramparts we watch'd, were so gallantly streaming?<br />
And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,<br />
Gave proof thro' the night that our flag was still there.<br />
O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave<br />
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?</span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">In the 60's and 70's I was adamantly against and still am ALL wars as a way to solve issues. If women had been drafted at that time, I would have burned my draft card and either gone to jail or would have moved to Canada. I still feel this way at age 64. The anthem and flag are symbols of war.</span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">It is why on my facebook posts there will be no "remembrances" of Pearl Harbor, the Vietnam War, Afghanistan, Iraq and even 9/11. What I will do is at my Goddess Altar will hold sadness for lives lost in senseless demonstrations of the patriarchal mindset of violence as the answer to problems with another. Why do we love to bring back to memory such things?</span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">It astounds me that when the President wants to make peace with a leader from another country, the people here in the US, are outraged (i.e. Cuba of recent). If the decision is to pull troops out of another country is made, threats begin to pour forth from the mouths of those who have not and never will have to go into such wars. If the announcement is we are going to war, people put flags on their houses and cars and wave them as we go to kill other human beings and then get pissed at the numbers of OUR people killed and rally around the numbers of how many people we have killed. And then.... we celebrate if we win cause it was all in the name of Democracy!</span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">My not standing for the anthem or the flag, is NOT a form of protest. I wouldn't stand if a Santa flag was brought into a football game. I don't stand when Who let the Dogs out is played at a basketball game. So why would I stand when a political flag or song is sung? I respect people who decide to use that as a form of protest, tho! This is America, this is a Democracy.... the Anthem tells us so. </span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">I would also not stand if President Obama (who I respect totally as the leader of this country) or Queen Elizabeth (who I admire and respect as a woman in power) would walk into a room. I do not see that as a sign of disrespect, I see it as whether I would stand if anyone would enter a room. </span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448">It is all smoke and mirrors of power and control. The Flag and the Anthem, just like many Christian hymns are meant to insight not peace, but pitting one against another. Not love but through the use of violence demonstrating who is the bigger bully, and in that way rejoicing over making others "be like us, believe like us, live like us and act like us." </span><br />
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What bothers me, is that on the one hand we proclaim that this is a Democracy! We proclaim that others have died in war so we can enjoy the privileges of living is such a place were we can indeed speak freely. But this is ONLY if it is what we believe is true, what we believe is right and just. And for me that is NOT democracy! That is power and control. And I protest anything that reeks of power and control. I believe in protest, but Never Violent protest even if it is what I believe in.<br />
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So, the Black Panthers... peaceful, silent protest!<br />
So, the NFL player...peaceful, silent protest!<br />
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Isn't that what America is about? I mean really.... we had to kill a shit load of people and have a shit load of our own people killed just so we could then bash someone who is actually taking this Democracy stuff to heart!<br />
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It blows my mind!<br />
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Peace out! <br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448"> </span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448"></span><span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448"></span><span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448"> </span><br />
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<span class=" d-b cl-b ml-25" id="yui_3_10_0_1_1473678461062_448"> </span> Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-62081052005271442782016-09-08T10:04:00.002-04:002016-09-08T10:04:48.817-04:00QUEEN PERSEPHONE<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mndY25pmnHM/V9FUxxeeRwI/AAAAAAAABJc/wIogPf5tHv8RspogatmGSD7k5pIIIYpiQCLcB/s1600/Queen%2BPersephone.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mndY25pmnHM/V9FUxxeeRwI/AAAAAAAABJc/wIogPf5tHv8RspogatmGSD7k5pIIIYpiQCLcB/s320/Queen%2BPersephone.jpg" width="255" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This is how the most Ancient Texts speak of Persephone. Queen of the Underworld. Alone on the Throne, not standing or sitting beside Hades. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In Goddess Times, there was no King of Hades! There was only most lovely and powerful Persephone, Maiden of the Triple Goddess! Daughter of Demeter! Granddaughter of Hekate! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Persephone came to me during my meditations this week to tell me exactly this. But She had more to reveal! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Ancient HerStory tells us that Persephone did indeed spend 6 months with the Dead and 6 months with the Living. She tended the Dead in the Underworld with Love and Compassion, Understanding and Protection. She appointed those who would help Souls arrive upon Death and appointed those who would help Souls move on to their final destination or to their next Life in Gaia's Garden. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Then when it was Time, Persephone left them in charge and She journeyed to Gaia's Garden where She meets Her Mother for the Time of Planting and Birthing. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Persephone then dances in the Garden, planting seeds, calling the leaves to sprout and the flowers to bloom. She continued to do this while Her Mother, Demeter, birthed! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Then when it was Time, Hekate, walked back to the Underworld Entrance with Persephone, and they said their good-byes. With this, the Garden Rested! And Darkness fell over the Garden not as a Time of Sadness, but as a Time of Rest, Renewal and Fallowness. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Perfection and Balance! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But then the patriarchal religions began to permeate Gaia's Garden and with it came the need to destroy the Goddess and Her Power. The Ancient HerStories were altered bringing with it violence, hate and power and control.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">No longer was there balance! Now the Underworld had a King who arrived into the Garden and kidnapped the Maiden Persephone, and raped Her, making Her his own! Of course, Demeter was distraught and as punishment (also a patriarchal idea) brought "winter" to the Garden and everyone and everything suffered. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But alas, good ol' boy Hades did in fact make a deal (power and control) and "allowed" Persephone to spend 6 months with Her Mama and Grandmother. The very act of Hades "allowing" his wife to visit the Garden was what made everyone and everything happy! Not Persephone! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As such, Balance was not restored and the story became all about Power and Control/Grief and Loss, and less about the Way of the Goddess and Her beautiful Plan! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">During my Journey with Persephone, She then told me this:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">"I, Persephone, embody both the Dark and the Light,
just as we all do."</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Persephone showed me that as the Maiden of the Triple
Goddess, She is the Caretaker of the Springs and Winters of our Lives. She is
both the Dark Moon and the New Moon. She is the Sun Rising and the Sun Setting. She is the Beginning and the End. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Persephone’s Story is one of Fertility and Death. This makes
Her very unique in the Triple Goddess archetype.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Most important, She told me, is that She does this by Her own Free Will. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">From this, all Womyn must re-member that we all have this Free Will. It is in re-claiming our Free Will that we will cease to be caught in the Story that is written for Us instead of by Us! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">For the Northern Hemisphere, Persephone is beginning Her Journey with Her Grandmother to the Underworld Entrance. This is a sweet Good-bye; no veil of sadness and grief falls overs the Garden. They both breathe a breath of Completion and Gratitude for the opportunity to let Gaia's Garden rest. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">So much to glean from the way HerStory is meant to be read! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Let it soak into your very Being and watch as we then learn to rejoice both in the Dark Moon and New Moon Times of our lives. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">And may we honor and adore Persephone as She makes this magickal Journey! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Blessed be! </span></div>
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-32176305460071833592016-07-28T12:53:00.004-04:002016-07-28T12:55:10.277-04:00FOR THE GREATER GOOD<br />
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"There is no Greater Good, only Good, however small the Good!"<br />
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Funny, how while watching a TV show, a profound and life changing statement will give me pause!<br />
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"There is no Greater Good, only Good, however small the Good!" said Dr. Theo Yedlin as the decision was made to hand select those going back into the pods. "It is for the Greater Good to only take those who are healthy and breeders." said Jason, the demented leader of the army in Wayward Pines.<br />
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This gave me pause.<br />
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I took an Ethics class in my graduate program where we struggled with what it means to make decisions based on "The Greater Good." Wars are waged and fought for "the Greater Good!" The Mentally Ill were mass sterilized at one time, "for the Greater Good!" Women were not allowed to vote "for the Greater Good!" LBGT community were not allowed to marry "for the Greater Good!" And I could go on and on and on!<br />
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My question in the Ethics course was very simple: "Who gets to decide what defines the Greater Good?" Of course we talked about how it depends on who is in charge of "the big decisions", be it religious leaders, politicians, doctors, judges, etc. There was a head nod to how each of us must make these decisions on a daily basis; as we discussed whether to let totally disabled babies live, whether to quit a job and have to live on food stamps because your boss asks you to falsify records, and such.<br />
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It was all framed around The Greater Good. Here is how the dictionary defines the Greater Good: "The benefit of the public, of more people than oneself; that which is better and more correct."<br />
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"That which is better or more correct." "The benefit of the public."<br />
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What is better or more correct than: THERE IS ONLY GOOD!<br />
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Dr. Yedlin says "There is no Greater Good, only Good, however small the Good."<br />
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Dr. Yedlin wanted to make the choices for who would go back into the pods and wake up thousands of years later, by lottery, since all could not go. That would be fair he said. But "for the Greater Good" the leaders only wanted those "perfect people" who could then breed to make more perfect people.<br />
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Yes, only a TV show, but I have found this story to really cause me to take ethical pauses, especially in this highly contested election year we are in.<br />
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I watched both conventions even tho' I am a Democrat. What I heard from the RNC was how one person would make the decisions for the Greater Good. What I heard from the DNC was how WE collectively as much as possible will make decisions based on THE GOOD!<br />
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We have been challenged, just like when JFK ran for office and won, to take care of our neighbor; our Muslim neighbor, our gay neighbor, our black, Asian, white neighbor, our poor and stinky neighbor, our mentally ill neighbor, our single mom who had an abortion neighbor, our pagan and Jewish neighbor.<br />
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WE ARE TO CHOOSE ONLY GOOD, NO MATTER HOW SMALL THE GOOD!<br />
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We have come through a time when it is all about the "I"! We are in a time when the Enemy is everyone who does not look like us, does not believe like us, does not love like us, does not worship, work or dress like us. The Enemy is everyone who is of a different race or nationality or an immigrant.<br />
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It's for the Greater Good I heard during the RNC to be forceful, carry more guns, hate, and eject those NOT LIKE US. And one man, all by himself will be making the decisions for the Greater Good.<br />
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NO MATTER HOW SMALL THE GOOD! That is what really gave me pause.<br />
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I pray that I never feel like I cannot stretch myself to do Good! Whether that be to fill up a backpack for underprivileged children, send a card to someone hurting or celebrating a birthday. Whether that be smiling at everyone I meet even when I am in my own pain. Whether that means "voting my conscience" and being proud to live in a country where I can do that. Whether it means leaving my pentacle at home on the day I helped my elderly mom serve lunch to her church ladies because I knew she was scared to death they would find out I was pagan and not Christian.<br />
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Whether that means praying for others, lighting candles for the sick, those morning and the world. Whether that means caring for animals and the earth by doing all I can in my own little piece of the forest. <br />
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Once upon a time, in my younger days, I truly felt it was all up to me to save all the children throughout the world. I convinced myself that without me, things would fall apart in my family of origin, my marriage family and my job and church.<br />
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One day, I was in a true panic attack over it all and I heard Goddess say to me:<br />
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"I ONLY ASKED YOU TO TAKE CARE OF THAT RIGHT IN YOUR PATH. IF EVERYONE WOULD DO THAT, WE WOULD NOT BE IN THE SITUATION WE ARE IN."<br />
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That is The Good!<br />
That is The Right!<br />
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To be kind, caring, compassionate, positive, giving, thankful, at peace, loving, faithful, and accepting of others to do their part in the unique way they are asked to fit into the puzzle.<br />
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In the end, Dr. Yedlin, only got his wish by sneaking in a gay boy and his quirky probably mentally ill receptionist. But I can promise you, all those in the pods waiting for the next time in Wayward Pines are not Pure, Perfect People. But someone, the"I" made the decision, all alone as to who would help the Greater Good!<br />
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We must all be intentional about doing Good, HOWEVER SMALL THE GOOD!<br />
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We do this while the crazy, "all about me" world goes on around us. And just maybe our example will spread like the mint in my pots... the plant started in one and now has sent out delicious shoots that have invaded all the other pots in my garden balcony! Ahhhh mint!<br />
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Pause. What are you really doing to choose the Good. Where can you discern how decisions made for this Greater Good hurts many others in the process. Will we always succeed? No! Will we make mistakes? Yes! Do we keep trying? Yes, cause as President Obama said in his DNC speech last night, "That's what happens when you try, mistakes happen." Then Trying leads to Hope in the face of Difficulty. And Hope leads to a better Today and Tomorrow!<br />
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Idealistic? I don't think so! I think this is what we are suppose to be doing, and have lost our way. If we take care of the neighbor and the neighbor takes care of us; there is no need to make decisions that ultimately exclude others. Because when Good is only doing for "the good of the public" then the individual faces go out of focus. <br />
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Be the Good, live the Good, demonstrate the Good!<br />
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Blessed be!<br />
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<br />Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-36420708550548845172016-07-22T15:04:00.004-04:002016-07-22T15:04:57.929-04:00Grieving is like a Dark Cloak<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FHD9KtHuTbI/V5JtxFJRPOI/AAAAAAAABIk/fRmnF7ivRAEm-kpsMcgEyOTJ4basOEW1QCLcB/s1600/Grieving%2BGoddess.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FHD9KtHuTbI/V5JtxFJRPOI/AAAAAAAABIk/fRmnF7ivRAEm-kpsMcgEyOTJ4basOEW1QCLcB/s320/Grieving%2BGoddess.jpg" width="174" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Grieving is like a dark cloak; both smothering and comforting. For
many it will be the first time they find themselves cloaked in a dark
and unforgiving world from which they never seem to wake up. For many it
is the comfort of a familiar; calling them cloak and heal. And for some
it is the Cloak of Fear and and Terror. And yet, at some time, we must
all put on this Cloak of Grief. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"> I saw it in different forms this morning in the ICU where I volunteer! The Dark Cloak surround<span class="text_exposed_show">ed
a Family who sobbed as they stood vigil with the man they loved as he
took his last breath. The Dark Cloak surrounded friends who were told
that the person they had gone to dinner with just 2 days before, was on
life support and would not live. I also saw the Cloak of Grief as a
Family Cried, Laughed and praised their God for their loved one was
finally out of pain and misery in her death! </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
I also watched as a woman donned this Cloak of Grief following the news
that her husband would be going home today and she would have to give
up her job to be his full time caretaker. She was going to file divorce
papers last week when he became critically ill. She now feels
responsible to be by his side for an indefinite period of time. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
How long will I feel like this? You will feel like this until you no
longer do. Everyone is different; every situation is unique and every
cloak is needed for as long as it takes.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"> Don't be willing to give
up the Cloak too quickly. Don't leave it hanging on the rack ignoring
the call to put it on! </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Embrace the Cloak, savor the Cloak, live in the
Cloak. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">And one day, the Cloak will have tucked itself into a drawer for
future use. And you will breathe knowing that it will not be the last
time you will need the Cloak, but you will rest knowing that the Cloak
did not smother you, strangle you or kill you. The Cloak was your Dark
Necessary Companion. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Blessed be! </span></span>Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-76626474014380766812016-07-18T18:26:00.000-04:002016-07-18T18:26:30.842-04:00Where did you see Goddess today?In 2004, my cousin took me to Iceland. It was a trip that changed many things in my life. At the time I was still an entrenched Christian. I was the Worship Team leader of the contemporary band, wrote daily devotions, set the altar, etc and yet, I battled every day in my heart, mind and soul to get out of that suffocating religion.<br />
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I found one of my devotions I wrote after my trip to Iceland. It was filled with "God created this and God created that;"and "he" language all through the devotional. I tried so hard to sneak in that "she" language in, but of course, I wasn't quite brave enough yet. In fact, when I finally did, I was told I was not allowed to, and thus began my exit from that religion.<br />
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But this is not what my blog is about today!<br />
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This is what my blog post is about:<br />
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I took this picture while standing on the Lava Field in Iceland. It takes 400 years for any growth to begin on the Lava Field. This, my friends, is the Glacier Waters flowing through the field and actually through and not over the Lava.<br />
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Water flowing THROUGH Lava! Ages old Lava at that. Lava that once was a fiery molten liquid itself, then hardened and laid barren for hundreds of years. And slowly, with time, growth began and the Glacier melted and froze over and over until the water channeled its way through the hardened rock.<br />
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I have been that hardened lava! I have been that hardened lava, laying barren and cold and desolate. But one day, She awakened me and began to gently flow through me. She found those cracks and crevices cause by lies and betrayals, abuse and control. She found me in my most desolate of times, after I had lived fiery and hot, but then left barren and forgotten! I was hardened and cold and bitter!<br />
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Luckily I didn't have to wait 400 years and neither do you! She came fast and furious, just like these glacier waters. She got my attention, filled all the wounded places and set me on my way! She found me in the Lava Field and changed my life!!!!!<br />
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Goddess finds us in these places and makes her face known just like in the following picture. What a surprise to see these red flowers growing in the middle of the lava field!<br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4yBtuJ4U7iQ/V41WTLjfvoI/AAAAAAAABIE/YpB5rCcCbkAFCRinURbcVfvAu3k7YnoXQCLcB/s1600/Iceland043.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4yBtuJ4U7iQ/V41WTLjfvoI/AAAAAAAABIE/YpB5rCcCbkAFCRinURbcVfvAu3k7YnoXQCLcB/s320/Iceland043.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Yep, looks exactly like the menstrual flow of the Goddess! Do you see it? No male God creates!!!!! Hell no!!!!! This is the sign of the Goddess. She nourishes us all the time; when we are conceiving, growing and when we are barren and dry. It is Her Cycle!<br />
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I loved Iceland. So much to learn there. So many things took my breath away. It is on my bucket list to return! She calls my name!<br />
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Blessed be! <br />
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-13883376338697226412016-07-17T16:41:00.001-04:002016-07-17T16:41:48.876-04:00Shallow Water! No Diving Allowed! <br />
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When I was 14, the parental unit took us kids to Myrtle Beach. The hotel we stayed in had a salt water pool. I guess I didn't see the sign: Shallow Water! No Diving Allowed" because I dove in off the side of the pool and scraped my front teeth on the bottom. I had a very large overbite at the time, so yes, my teeth were outside my lips. I had closed my eyes due to the salt water.<br />
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My two front teeth were scrapped and very jagged which meant I had a swollen bottom lip most of the rest of vacation. When we got home, the dentist filed them down and I went on my merry way!<br />
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The treadmill at my apartment gym faces the pool. In front of me every time I walk, is that sign. Now, I no longer go into pools, oceans or lakes to swim...oh not because of the tooth incident...but I don't even own a bathing suit anymore!<br />
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Well, for the past few weeks I have been haunted by this sign:<br />
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SHALLOW WATER <br />
NO DIVING ALLOWED<br />
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"What say you?" I asked my self.<br />
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Ahhh.... finally an answer after all my sweat and daily 5 mile walks.<br />
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We, as human beings, tend to be quite Shallow. There are times, I look into the eyes of a Wolf or Bear and think they are Deeper Thinkers than we are.<br />
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Only when the Waters are Deep enough, should Diving take place. There is a lot of power contained in Diving. We intentionally, enter the Waters hands and head first; our heads being very vulnerable indeed.<br />
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I knew a young man once, who decided to dive into a shallow pool in the ocean. He hit his head on a rock and died.<br />
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And yet, we only want to dive into those Shallow places. It seems too daunting, too time consuming to dive Deeper. In the Shallow waters is where we find the hard places, so why would we want to go deeper? If there are dangers there, why in the hell do we want to see what lies Deeper still.<br />
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But sweet ones.... that is where the answers are. That is where the darkness shows us beauty and life that is beyond our reckoning. There is were the waters are colder, healing and refreshing.<br />
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Yes, we are Shallow people.<br />
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Shallow places are where Anger, Hate and Violence reside.<br />
Shallow places are where the scars from abuse, neglect, poverty and judgement reside.<br />
Shallow places are where entitlement lives!<br />
Shallow places are where religious and political leaders abide! <br />
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We take the word of who ever is speaking from the pulpit or in front of a microphone at the time; as long as they are speaking from the Shallow Waters. No way are we going to dive into Deeper Waters where the Real Questions and Answers reside! It is in the Deeper Waters where we see through the lies, the betrayal, the power and control. It is there we have to do the hard work, to be able to breathe.<br />
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I believe we live in very Shallow Times which means we live in very Dangerous Times.<br />
It is us, who are called to the Deeper Waters, who will find the Divine Voice of Love, Light and Reason.<br />
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The Deeper Waters have no place for Anger, Resentment, Killing, Racism, Misogyny, Homophobia, Inequality, Entitlement, Jealously, or Hatred.<br />
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I choose to go to the Deeper Waters and when I surface, I choose to Walk in the Truth Found There. And when Thirsty for Truth again, I will Dive, as I only choose to Dive into Deep Waters.<br />
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I learned my lesson once... well probably more than once.... yes, I am sure I did... but now, sweet ones, I watch for that Sign of the Goddess:<br />
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SHALLOW WATER<br />
NO DIVING ALLOWED<br />
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I invite you to ignore the Shallow Waters and join me in the Deeper Waters.<br />
Truth awaits us! <br />
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Blessed be! Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-91059059668578462742016-06-29T10:24:00.000-04:002016-06-29T10:24:06.988-04:00AGE OF AQUARIUS! <br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/--DviOkeX4Fg/V3PY1qlxoeI/AAAAAAAABHA/gOhL6wvoLMUYSL6qQh6b81J7f4_zONc2gCLcB/s1600/Age%2Bof%2BAquarius5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/--DviOkeX4Fg/V3PY1qlxoeI/AAAAAAAABHA/gOhL6wvoLMUYSL6qQh6b81J7f4_zONc2gCLcB/s320/Age%2Bof%2BAquarius5.jpg" width="255" /></a></div>
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Ahhhhh to be back in the 60's! That is what I have been thinking about of late.<br />
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I was so full of hope and faith that this world would be different by the time I got in my 60's. So here I am approaching my 64th birthday and damn.... HOPE was about gone! It seems for every step forward, we take 5 backwards. And now we have a Republican Presidential Candidate who keeps saying "Make America great again." Like America, humanity was Great in the past and not so now?<br />
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How about MAKING AMERICA GREAT period! We really don't want to go back, do we????<br />
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But yes, of late I have wanted to return to those days in my youth when I actually believed I would see the Age of Aquarius in my life time. You know, the Age of Love, Peace, Partnership, Equality, Peace......<br />
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And then it hit me..... The Age of Aquarius lasts 2000 years! And in the 60's was the DAWNING of the Age of Aquarius.<br />
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When I began to look at it like that. Then the very small steps we have taken (small in my view), do make sense and seem bigger than I thought.<br />
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I have seen the end of Negro bathrooms, Negro water fountains and the right for Blacks to vote and hold office! I HAVE HAD AN AFRICAN AMERICAN PRESIDENT FOR 8 YEARS!<br />
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I am now seeing a Woman Presidential Candidate who I admire and will hopefully have a Woman President in my lifetime; not just because she is a woman, but she is a competent and intelligent woman.<br />
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Roe vs Wade was during my time and women are still legally able to get an abortion in this country in spite of the Christian Right influencing the closing of many clinics.<br />
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Even tho' the ERA has yet to be ratified, women now hold jobs that were "only for men" as I was growing up.<br />
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I can have my own credit, my own loans, my own car, and have access to the same education as a man. I had access to birth control and could have my tube tied without my husband's approval. <br />
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The LBGT community have received the right to marry and moving closer to more rights in this country.<br />
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These are only a few of the major changes I have seen. Yes indeed, we are not there yet and for every step forward there are too many going backwards, BUT.....<br />
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If we look at the Age of Aquarius as 2000 years then damn... I guess "We have come a long way, Baby."<br />
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What has changed for me, is that I am handing over the torch to others. I will always be passionate about those issues near and dear to my heart: ALL WOMEN'S ISSUES, mental health access, Death with Dignity, strict gun control, free health care for all, and equality for all (especially for the LBGT community). But I will now assume the role of Crone holding Love and Light for Peace and Wisdom. It does not mean I will stop speaking out. What it means is that I will be speaking from a different place. That being a place of Love/Peace/Hope. That is the only energy I will now be putting out into the Universe.<br />
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Yes, I will share my Wisdom where and when I can. Yes, I will support those issues that will help move humanity to a more peaceful and wise place. Yes, I will always believe that the Patriarchal Mind Set must be squelched in order for a return to the Partnership Mind Set; that Mind Set of the Goddess.<br />
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I will not see the Age of Aquarius in full action in my Lifetime, but I have now regained the hope that one day it will be so!<br />
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<br /><strong>Age Of Aquarius Lyrics</strong></span><br />
<div id="inlyr" style="font-size: 14px;">
When the moon is in the Seventh House<br />
And Jupiter aligns with Mars<br />
Then peace will guide the planets<br />
And love will steer the stars<br />
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This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius<br />
The Age of Aquarius<br />
Aquarius! Aquarius!<br />
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Harmony and understanding<br />
Sympathy and trust abounding<br />
No more falsehoods or derisions<br />
Golden living dreams of visions<br />
Mystic crystal revelation<br />
And the minds true liberation<br />
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Aquarius, Aquarius<br />
<br />
When the moon is in the seventh house<br />
And Jupiter aligns with Mars<br />
Then peace will guide the planets<br />
And love will steer the stars<br />
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This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius<br />
The age of Aquarius, Aquarius, Aquarius<br />
Aquarius, Aquarius<br />
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Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine <br />
in<br />
Let the sun shine, Let the sun shine in, The sun shine </div>
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(Lyrics found <a href="http://www.elyrics.net/read/0-9/5th-dimension-lyrics/age-of-aquarius-lyrics.html">here</a>)<br />
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<span>Peace out! </span><br />
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<br />Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-49821203675667178012015-12-15T18:38:00.002-05:002015-12-15T18:38:41.916-05:00Listening to Our Own Divine Female Voice! Surprises await! <div data-contents="true">
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<span data-offset-key="94eh8-0-0"><span data-text="true">I have a story I want to share. This is a story about Listening to Goddess! Listening to our Inner Voice! Listening and then following even if it doesn't make a bit of sense and if you think it is for one reason when in reality it is for Goddess-reason! This is not a story about me or what I did. It is about what happens when we Listen and follow! </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">I work for a very unpleasant woman. She is a controlling, micro-manager who seems to have a mean streak in her. Well, last Monday, I took the brunt of the "mean streak" and I was pissed as hell when I got off work. I knew that her mother was in hospice in many states away, but she was her usual demeaning self and so I couldn't even use that as an excuse. Yep, quitting work crossed my mind once again.</span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Well, during the night I woke to go to the bathroom and this woman was on my mind. Great, I thought, I can't even sleep without her showing up! </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">As I opened my eyes with the morning light, who was on my mind, but this woman. But now I had a calm about me and I kept hearing.... take her flowers today! Oh sure I argued with myself! She doesn't like when people do nice things for her and why should I do that...she is not nice to me. Well, I must say, I could not keep this thought out of my mind. </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">On the way to work, I stopped by the grocery store, and found myself buying a bouquet of flowers and before I left home, I copied the previous blog post about Letting Go to give to her. </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Let me confess, I told my sister on the ride into work that I was going to "try and kill her with kindness". I was not going to let her steal my joy or make me quit my job. I knew her mom was terminal and she was having a hard time. I would show her what kindness looked like. So there! Gotta love when your inner two year old shows up! </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">I walked into her office with the flowers and the blog post. She was surprised, smiled at me and gave me a hug. Yep.... a hug! Later she sent me an email thanking me for the flowers and said the Letting Go writing touched her deeply and she needed it so much right now. </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Fast forward to yesterday. Her boss came to my office to make sure I was going to be working next week as "she" was going to be out of town on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. I said, "Is she going to see her mom for Christmas." "No," he said, "her mom died last Monday. They are having the funeral next week." </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Last Monday..... the day of her being mean to me and a whole bunch of other people. She nor her boss told anyone her mom had died. In fact yesterday was the first anyone of us had heard of this. </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Do you see where this is going? </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Today, I stopped in her office and this is what I said, "I am sorry I didn't know your mom died." She said, "You didn't? Then why the flowers or the note last Tuesday? I thought maybe your brother (who owns the company) told you." So I told her how I couldn't get her off my mind and my inner heart voice told me to get her flowers. (I didn't tell her what I thought the reason was, you know... killing her with kindness!)</span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">She began to tear up as I told her that none of us knew her mom had died, and that we didn't want her to think that we didn't care since no one had said anything to her. We spent some time talking about grief and loss, etc. I left her office and really thought long and hard about this situation.</span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">At age 63, I can promise you that I have had a lot of Divine Appointments just by listening to Goddess speaking through my own Inner Female Voice. I can envision Her laughing at me, as I reluctantly went to the store and had my own warped agenda for getting flowers for a woman who had been so mean to me just the day before. Goddess then Unveils Her Plan and it reminds me that I really am Her Vessel. She flowed right through me last Tuesday and today. </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Now, do I think all this will change this woman. Probably not! But we both had lessons to learn. I was reminded that Love and Kindness is always the Plan of Goddess. And She will even take my worst excuse for being nice and turn it into a magickal moment! </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Listening and Responding is the Greatest Gift we can give ourselves, others and most certainly Goddess! </span></span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="fituf-0-0"><span data-text="true">Be mindful! Be aware! Be Blessed! </span></span></div>
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Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-26992070166540314512015-11-18T19:19:00.001-05:002015-11-18T19:19:27.745-05:00In Letting Go, Love Flows Most Freely<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Life is full of Letting Go's!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">When I was pregnant with my children, I grieved and rejoiced in the Letting Go, as they left the safety of my womb. The Cord was cut and I had to Let Go of it being only Us.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">The first day of Day Care, I had to Let Go, as someone else was going to be raising my child during the day while I was at work. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">And then it was the First Day of Preschool, Kindergarten, Middle School, High School and College. There was the first day they took the car out by themselves; the first dance, date and first Scout badge, first swim meet and first week away camp. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Life is full of Letting Go's! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">It is how we do the Letting Go's that is important. You see, all the Letting Go's are both Dying and Living times. We grieve the Letting Go of what is, for what will be. We grieve the little boy becoming a young man and then an adult. We grieve the little girl becoming a young woman and then an adult. We grieve as they pack up their things and move into their first apartment. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">But if we rejoice in all of this Letting Go, we send our children off with the greatest blessings on earth. We tell them that we honor that the Journey is their own and not ours. We are just invited along for the ride, or not! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Life is full of Letting Go's! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I think tho' what is the hardest is when it comes to Letting Go of someone as they make their Transition from this world to the next. This Letting Go carries burdens that we cannot be prepared for. How we do this Letting Go is a blessing to both our loved one and to ourselves. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Many of us even hold on to Life as if in doing that we will live forever. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">We don't do Letting Go well in this culture. We are taught to hang on to everything; our money, our possessions, our traditions, our family and our beliefs. We hang on to all of these because they are familiar. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">So, as I watch the Leaves Fall from the Trees, I wonder what we are to learn? The Tree births beautiful flowers and leaves in the Spring, uses them for nesting birds and for shade and most definitely to provide us oxygen! And yet, most trees then enter the Season of Letting Go. The Tree pulls back the nourishment to the leaves so their brilliance can come forth and then they must fall to the ground. To become one with the ground, give back to the ground, decay and provide nourishment to the tree for the next season's birthing. It's a Cycle you see. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">And so is our Letting Go! I have learned of late that it is In the Letting Go, that Love Flows Most Freely. When I no longer "hold on" I am free to Love deeply and unconditionally. I give because I want to, not because I think it is what I should do or must do. I say good bye with a genuine longing in my heart for the next hello. In the Letting Go, my Love for another flows most freely.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Letting Go is hard, frustrating, full of grief and loss. It is why we hold on so tightly. For you see, when we actually Let Go, we are giving up our need for Power and Control. In Letting Go, Love Flows Most Freely. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I Let Go of a lot this Year with much struggle and trepidation. What would my life look like when I finally Let Go of all that needed to be Let Go of. I discovered that it looks like </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"> Love Flowing Freely. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Blessed be! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"> </span>Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-43511684058469402092015-11-17T07:00:00.000-05:002015-11-17T07:36:18.118-05:00A Journey to the Cave with Hecate<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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During a massage in February, I have this Vision. Walking with Hecate right now through an online Journey, I re-membered meeting with Her in the Clearing and what She taught me at that time.<br />
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THE VISION <br />
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I arrived in The Clearing, the field full of Spring Flowers. I stood and soaked up the clear blue skies and scents of Spring. To my right, just outside the Tree Line, sat Hecate in Her Triple Goddess Forms. Maiden, Mother, Crone, around the Fire Pit, sewing together pieces of a QUILT.<br />
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Crone spoke: 'Come sit, my daughter.' <br />
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I sat and waited an Eternity. <br />
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Crone spoke: 'You did not finish the QUILT of your marriage. You have patches left undone. You have unfinished business.'<br />
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Crone spoke: 'We are the VOICE of all WOMEN and as such certain pieces of your QUILT must be A Dark Completion. GO TO THE CAVE!' She said as She went back to Her sewing with arthritic hands.<br />
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THE CAVE<br />
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The Cave is where I have joined the Sisters of the Goddess Table in many visions. There is a Red Crystal Table at the entrance. But today, no food was set and no Sisters present.<br />
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Shortly the Fae came up from the depths of the Cave and escorted me into Gaia's Womb. There, where many Healing Visions have taken place, the Fae took off my clothing and bathed me. Then I was robed and jewels placed on my head.<br />
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GIRLS AND WOMEN of all ages, all races, all religions, all economic status; all Girls and Women began pouring out from the Dark Crevices and up from the holes in the ground of Gaia's Womb. Some clothed but most covered in Veils of SHAME, and many naked with SCARS and WOUNDS blazing brightly. I stood in the middle of Gaia's WOMB as these Girls and Women surrounded me. This Chant began:<br />
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WE ARE THE PROSTITUTES!<br />
WE ARE THE SEX-TRAFFICKED ONES!<br />
WE ARE THE ANOREXIA, THE BULIMIC, THE OBESE! <br />
WE ARE THE PORN ONES!<br />
WE ARE THE BEATEN, THE BURNED!<br />
WE ARE THE RAPED ONES!<br />
WE ARE THE ROBBED AND MURDERED ONES! <br />
WE ARE THE SEXUALLY ABUSED ONES!<br />
WE ARE THE HUNGRY, THE COLD, THE LOST AND THE FORGOTTEN!<br />
WE ARE THE INVISIBLE ONES!<br />
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WE HAVE NO VOICE!<br />
YOU MUST BE OUR VOICE!<br />
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My tears flowed, as I have been a VOICE for so long and I am weary of the JOURNEY.<br />
I know their plight.<br />
I know THE VEIL OF SHAME.<br />
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And I knew why Crone sent me here. My VOICE will never be done. Never! I am not finished with the pieces of the QUILT that will banish one man from continuing to hurt women. I am THESE WOMEN and THESE WOMEN are ME! And we are THE DIVINE FEMALE!<br />
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I asked the Fae to bring Food and Drink, and we sat and ate together as we shared OUR stories. We sat and ate together as we weaved the Healing Quilt of Sisterhood. We continued writing HerStory!<br />
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The Time came for me to go. I hugged them all, and was escorted from the Womb of Gaia. Some of the Girls and Women came with me, but many were not ready to leave behind their Veils of Shame, Abuse, Hurt, Betrayal. They will remain nestled in Gaia's Womb while the rest of us Speak Boldly our Stories. As each of us do, another Woman is empowered to be Birthed into the World of Healing and Wholeness.<br />
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I, and many others, will be waiting for their Birth at the entrance of the Cave; just like Demeter waited for Her daughter Persephone to arrive. It is our words, our VOICES that will bring on the Labor Pains and the Ultimate Full Birthing of the Goddess into the World!<br />
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Blessed be!<br />
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<br />Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-1614549462627103562015-10-17T09:12:00.000-04:002015-10-17T09:12:58.689-04:00EVE<br />
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I don't think I have ever done a book review here on my blog, but after reading Eve by Wm. Paul Young I just knew I had to find a way to get out my frustration! So this will be a book review like none other, I am sure!<br />
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So, this Young guy is the "bestselling author of The Shack." Yes, I read the Shack when I was a Christian and jumped for joy that God was a huge black woman! I had many upset parishioners claiming blasphemy at such a thought, and I would gently remind them that it was a piece of fiction and not a theological writing; all the while giggling inside myself.<br />
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So, I thought Eve just had to be about Eve being God or in control of the entire creation thing, etc. Oh was I surprised.<br />
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Now it took a bit to get to it. This book has a "sci-fi" lend to it, but there it came.... slapped me right in the face. Now Young calls this Male God, Adonani. (which is in fact one of God's names) So, Lily, who has come a a Witness to Creation, watches as Adonani bears down in labor and pushes Adam out of HIS (yep, that pronoun is used for Adonani) God womb. And then, Adonani lifts Adam to HIS breasts and feeds HIS most glorious creation. Ok, I almost stopped reading at that point. (As a Christian teenager I was almost thrown out of Sunday School class when I objected to a Male God giving birth to anything!)<br />
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But alas, I kept reading.<br />
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Well, Adam gets bored of naming all the animals and demands that Adonani give him someone like himself. So, Adam becomes PREGNANT with Eve, and Adonani has to perform a C-Section (my words here, in the book it says Adonani cut Eve out of Adam). And then holy fucking shit.... Adam nurses Eve at his breasts, and then raises her to adulthood which in Eden time takes like one chapter!<br />
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Now, I did get a bit interested here when we find out that the serpent and Adam are in cahoots with each other to set Eve up to eat the Fig (not an apple if you want to be biblical). Then when Adonani finds them with the leaves on their private parts Adam and the serpent blame Eve for making them eat the fig and laugh when Adonani seems to believe them. Well, it is Adam who is blamed for the Fall and He is escorted out of the Garden along with the serpent who is now a lowly snake and Eve gets to stay in Eden.<br />
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Ok, I thought ..... I like this! BUT here is how the story goes; every day Adam comes to the walls of Eden that he can't see through and begs Eve to come with him. He is so lonely, and life is so hard. Well, Eve can see him and goes to Adonani and tells Him that she wants to go be with Adam. She loves him so much even tho', he set her up, lied, betrayed her, etc etc etc. And she needs to go and be with him. She promised to bear his sons, she misses him so much! And so, she goes and does just that.<br />
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Glad it was near the end of the book. I thought I was going to vomit. Supposedly, the point of this story is that God loves HIS children no matter what they do, but they have to suffer for not obeying him. Oh and by the way.... Lilith gets a small part when Lily is told that is who she really is, but omg..... thank goodness that was not true cause Lilith was bad Karma in the "MYTHOLOGICAL story".<br />
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Would I recommend this book. HELL NO!!!!<br />
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It continues the story that a Male God fucking got pregnant, had a vagina and birthed things into the world and then developed breasts so to feed everything. It continues the story that women are to follow and stay with "their" man who gives birth to who they are no matter what.<br />
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It reminds me of one of the first things the EX said to me when we moved in together. He said, "I am here to help you reach your potential. To become everything you can become." What he meant was HIS POTENTIAL AND EVERYTHING HE WANTED ME TO BECOME. He defined me, just like Adam defined Eve.<br />
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Oh Young tried at times to make Eve out to have so much power but in the end she did not. She too turned from this God but she did so in order to turn to her domineering husband.<br />
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Here is what part of the back cover says about this book: "Eve opens a refreshing conversation about the equality of men and women within the context of our beginnings, helping us see each other as our Creator does.... complete, unique, and not constrained by cultural rules or limitations."<br />
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I must have read a different book.<br />
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The end! Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-29071736680410017492015-07-14T17:35:00.000-04:002015-07-14T17:35:21.357-04:00The Gift of Time! I must confess I am a 1st born, Type A, work driven, perfectionist. I like to be busy and to have a purpose. I like to stir the Cauldron to bring attention to issues I am passionate about.<br />
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Much has been on my mind of late about this personality I have had since, oh I don't know...BIRTH!<br />
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What I have been meditating on is this: Is it possible that my Purpose for journeying this lifetime has been fulfilled? Have I already done the work I came to do? If so, then what does that mean for the rest of my life here on this Journey? Is my "Life" over, as I know it?<br />
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I have spent much time with SEKHMET this week as I ponder these questions.<br />
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Here is what She told me in no uncertain words!!!!!<br />
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1. Yes, I have completed my "purpose" in life. I came to be the Mama Bear ,not only for my own children, but for those children who were abused and neglected and abandoned for the 33 years I did social work. I then was the Mama Bear the 2 years I did International and Domestic Adoptions. Even at seminary, I had adopted daughters and sons, who I mentored through those years in "real life" operating systems.<br />
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2. Well done! I heard SEKHMET say loudly to me.<br />
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3. Yes, I have completed my "purpose" in life. I marched for peace and civil rights. I have been a very outspoken Voice for the marginalized, impoverished and forgotten. I have supported causes others would not take a second look at and I stood against the Porn industry when I left the husband of 30 years.<br />
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4. Well done! I heard SEKHMET say loudly to me.<br />
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Then there was quiet.<br />
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So what is my purpose now, SEKHMET? What am I to take on? What cause needs my voice. Am I just being lazy, working only 20 hours a week when I could be working 40 hours a week? Am I crazy for taking my Social Security now, so I can only work 20 hours a week? What am I to do with my time? I feel like a lazy good for nothing woman. No one to care for, no causes I am actively fighting. My mom tells me I should volunteer with all these extra hours I now have. That I should be doing SOMETHING WITH MY TIME!<br />
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Here is what I heard:<br />
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1. Your purpose is to now care for YOU! It is YOUR TIME! You have worked more hours than many over your lifetime. You have seen and done things others would cringe at, if they knew all that you did as a social worker. You were the Lionness, the Mama Bear and the Wolf! You howled to make changes in laws. You kept your kids and other kids safe as you possibility could, and you walked the path of Peace all while seeing and experiencing the horrors of abuse, neglect and mental illness outside and inside your home.<br />
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2. Stop feeling guilty that you now have Time for YOU! Stop feeling like you have to fill your time with something others think is worthy. Stop! You deserve now to do what you want to do, when you want to do it, and how you want to do it and with whom you want to do it. That includes doing NOTHING!<br />
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3. You still have a compassionate heart that reaches out to others as you feel called to do so. But now, you have time to sit with me, SEKHMET and learn at my feet! You have time to ponder questions deeper than you have before for no other reason but it is fun and fulfilling; even if you never share it with another human being.<br />
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4. You just happened to be called to complete your Big Tasks earlier in your life. Now you are reaping the sweet joy of Living in your own time and space.<br />
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And there was Stillness.<br />
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Do I know how to do that? Can I really give in to not Planning for the next thing? Can I actually sit and read a book for hours without thinking what I "should" be doing next? Can I actually focus on caring for Me?<br />
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It feels right and freeing! It feels like, I have opened up Sacred Space not only for me but for others as well. It feels like the New Beginning that has been bubbling in my Cauldron of late.<br />
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Today, I begin to appreciate the Gift of Time; of My Time!<br />
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I think I will have a cup of hot cocoa on this 98 degree day and go see how Harry Potter, Ron and Hermione are doing at Hogwarts! And then maybe I will just sit and watch the Hummingbirds stopping by for their evening meal. And then maybe I will watch brainless TV!<br />
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Yep....The Gift of Time...Me Time! I earned it the hard way! It is mine! <br />
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Blessed be!<br />
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<br />Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-56900167489960336412015-06-08T15:50:00.000-04:002015-06-08T15:50:00.361-04:00Quest 2015 Surprise!!!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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In January, I began Quest 2015 after hearing that word all through the month of December. Yesterday, I completed Book One on this Journey.<br />
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Today I began Book 2 with this entry:<br />
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"I thought I was on a Healing Quest but now 6 months into it and SEKHMET (Goddess of Anger/Wrath/Peacemaker) came to the surface to show me that was not true. I already was Healed.<br />
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I Healed when I threw hundreds of Porn CD's at Bob (now the ex) that night I found, 'Daddy's Little Girl' CD in his briefcase.<br />
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I Healed when I disclosed in family therapy his porn addiction and it's impact on me and the children.<br />
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I Healed when we sat at the dining room table after his car wreck and told him Steph and I were moving out.<br />
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I Healed November 2002, when we moved into our own apartment.<br />
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I Healed when I told him I was filing for divorce.<br />
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I Healed when the divorce papers came.<br />
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I Healed when Pastor Mark and Pastor Gerry told me to stay in the marriage and I left anyway.<br />
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I Healed when I went to seminary to find god and found Goddess waiting for me there.<br />
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I Healed when I left the Christian Tradition.<br />
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I Healed when I put on my Witch Cloak.<br />
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I Healed when I told my parents and others.<br />
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I Healed when I gave David permission to not 'owe' me anything...not even his attention and love.<br />
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The Healing has already been done~~~ a long time ago.<br />
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So why do I get triggered by sexual abuse, porn, misogyny, racism, homophobia?<br />
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SEKHMET Finally Came To Me!<br />
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Here is what She taught me:<br />
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THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MY WOUNDING AND MY ANGER AND WRATH!<br />
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You see even before the wounding began, I was aware of the injustices in the World. Hell, I was aware early on that Blacks were lower class according to my family, government, church and society. I remember the Colored bathrooms and bus seats. And even as a young girl I was questioning and mad about it. I was angry when as a teen, that I couldn't be an acolyte or carry a cross in the service because I was a girl. And I fit right into the 60's with all this awareness and righteous anger!<br />
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SEKHMET has always been in my DNA~~~~ I just didn't know Her name! I just knew I was angry at a bunch of stuff. <br />
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My Parents had it Wrong!<br />
My Family had it Wrong!<br />
My Neighbors had it Wrong!<br />
My Church had it Wrong!<br />
My Government had it Wrong!<br />
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ANGER~~~~~~~RAGE~~~~~~PEACEMAKER<br />
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I argued with my parents and pastors. I protested the Vietnam War. I marched for Women's Rights, Civil Rights, Environmental rights and Church Change.<br />
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AND I BECAME A SOCIAL WORKER to no surprise.<br />
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There I could change families, empower women, feed the hungry and stop the abuse. I won the War on many Fronts, but not the Marriage Front (or so I thought). There the Wounding took place.<br />
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THE WOUNDED HEALER I became and I was damn good at it!<br />
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I wanted to have my own children as that to me was the Promise that the Plan for a better world would happen. And with SEKHMET and Mama Bear by my side I did my best to protect and guide them. But I could not shelter them from their father.<br />
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I HAD to stay you see. I HAD no choice. I thought it was the only way to Protect them. And I became the Wrathful Wife. And then when the Cubs could fend for themselves, I could finally leave.<br />
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But since then, I was convinced that my Life was about Healing. But like this remarkable Human Body I reside in, I Heal Quickly! And I did! I just didn't know it. Now I do!<br />
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SEKHMET poured forth from my DNA and gave name to my Anger, Rage and Wrath. She Provided the definition and form. She provides the framework for my Journey from this point forward. I totally embrace Anger, Rage and Wrath as my own Reaction to ALL that is Wrong in the World.<br />
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THIS VOICE I have always been!<br />
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So when I see a report about a Judge not punishing a man who raped a 3 year old because the man "did not set out to do harm to the little girl," I post: I HATE MEN AND THE PATRIARCHAL RAPE CULTURE THEY RIDE IN ON! And yes, I mean ALL MEN!<br />
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Do I harbor Anger, Rage and Wrath? Yes! Is it ok? Yes? Does it eat me alive and make me unhealthy? Not one bit!<br />
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*I am Angry that my parents did nothing to Chuck (my brother) when they found out he had been raping my baby sister for 8 years.<br />
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*I have Rage that they continued to have a relationship with him; going on vacations, football games and holiday celebrations.<br />
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*I have Anger that my mother almost grieved herself to death when Chuck cut off all contact with her and my dad.<br />
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*I am Angry that for whatever the reason, Dad had to tell me about his affair and that she looked just like me.<br />
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*I am Angry that there are still Secrets in my Family.<br />
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*I am Angry that the man who fathered my children was so addicted to porn and so narcissistic that he would not give that up, even tho' it was wounding his wife and his children.<br />
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*I have Rage that my son suffers from Mental Illness and there are limited resources to help him and others. <br />
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*I am Angry that the Church brainwashes still and controls the government (along with NRA).<br />
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*I am Angry about the War on Women, Immigrants, and Homosexuals.<br />
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*I am full of Wrath toward the Porn Industry.<br />
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*I am full of Wrath toward the Patriarchal Rape Culture that rules the World.<br />
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And all the While I set the Goddess Table of Peace each morning as that is the Other Side of SEKHMET and of me!<br />
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I have not been Broken and Wounded for a Long Time. Those who meant to hurt me, did not win.<br />
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When my Heart was Cut out, I grew another fuller one!<br />
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When my Voice Box was removed, I grew a new one with larger Pipes!<br />
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When others Rights were being Smashed, I joined in and picked them up with the New Hands I had grown when mine were removed.<br />
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And when my Brain was being rewired, I took wire cutters and dissected away the horrific lies and control messages.<br />
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Oh no~~~~~ I am NOT Healing~~~~ I Healed right after each cut, each bashing, each body part removal.<br />
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I move on this Journey in Wisdom, Self-Love and my own Affirmations of my Worth.<br />
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It is a New Day! Me and my Traveling companions:<br />
SEKHMET ME HEKATE<br />
Mama Bear Shewa Wolf Lioness"<br />
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Blessed be! <br />
<br />
<br />
Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6072705331762874900.post-41669768460947511642015-06-04T07:54:00.000-04:002015-06-04T07:54:45.548-04:00SEKHMET joins my pantheon; not like she wasn't always there!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I am happy that at 62 years of age, I still stand in awe of how I can be surprised and amazed at how life unfolds. Here is my SEKHMET story.<br />
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So, two weeks ago, I was having my massage and during a most relaxing healing hands session, I traveled to my Clearing and there met up with Hekate. There were questions I needed answers to, but instead she gave me Lioness as a new (yea, right!) traveling spirit animal. She joins my long time spirit animals: Wolf and Brown Bear.<br />
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That was the answer to why I keep hearing: "He will Drown!"? What??? Come on Hekate, I need answers not another animal companion. But I did not say any of that to Hekate and really I like Lions so I was pleased, just sent away without answers. Or so I thought.<br />
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Gotta hate a Goddess who won't let you know what is going on!!!!<br />
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When I came home, I began to research the Energy brought by Lioness. She is a message of balance as she moves in both the day and night; prudence, keep an even mind, do not overdo, strength, courage, royality, dignity, power, authority, justice, wisdom and ferocity.<br />
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Balance had been a theme the entire week before, at both home and at work.<br />
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This gift was given on a Monday, Tuesday I called off work. Yes, I had been very out of balance, yes I had allowed others to set my agenda and suck all the life out of me, yes I had given my power to others and forgot that I was born with the heart of dignity, justice, wisdom and ferocity.<br />
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I sure was happy to have Lioness now in my life as one of my three traveling spirit companions.<br />
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Well, this was not the end of the story. Hekate had sent her also to open my mind to realize another Goddess had been with me since I can remember but I did not know Her. She knew I needed to embrace this Goddess in my Psyche Archetype Committee and it was now!<br />
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You see, it was time for me to complete the Banishment Poppet Ritual regarding the ex. This man is a sexual pervert, mysognist, narcissistic, evil man who wounded me and my two children deeply. I needed to embrace my Rage and Anger as the Shadow part of me that had been stolen by the Patriarchal Culture all my life. OH yes, I would get mad and be full of rage over a lot of things, but it was not totally under control and not well thought out AND I would then feel guilty as hell for months on end.<br />
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You see, I was the good girl. I was the well behaved first born. I was Susie Christian. I was the best employee, friend, sister, daughter....you name it I was Susie Sunshine who helped others, watched out for others and always forgave anyone who wronged me. But deep inside Pele was spewing lava all over the place and every now and then it would spew out. Everyone would be shocked and remind me that was not "me" and then the guilt would set in. In fact, after arguments with the ex, it was me who would go out and buy him something or go overboard to make it all right because by arguing and yelling I was not being the peacemaker and sweet wife I was to be.<br />
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OK, back to SEKHMET.... wow, I can get off point!<br />
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So, one evening I went looking for a piece of paper to write on and pulled out a notebook from my shelf. I didn't remember, but 5 years ago I had been reading the book Godddesses in Older Women and taking notes in this notebook.<br />
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I opened it and yep you got it: There in highlighted words was this:<br />
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GODDESS OF TRANSFORMATIVE WRATH<br />
HER NAME IS OUTRAGE<br />
HER NAME IS SEKHMET<br />
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Next highlighted on the page:<br />
GODDESS OF WRATH AND PEACE!<br />
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He name means Powerful. She is Protectress with strength and ability to spring upon evildoers and transgressors.<br />
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She does not initiate or provoke conflict, but when divine order is threatened, she responds with the direct savagery of a protective lioness.<br />
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She is a healer and is associated with both life and death (I was a Douala and present at deaths) and her presence is invoked in situation of life and death (social worker).<br />
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She is the embodiment of Earth (I am Virgo and must be outside).<br />
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SEKHMET is Triple Goddess: Creator, Sustainer of life (healer), Destroyer<br />
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Then this was quoted from the book: "Women often come to know Destroyer as they age; as they live long enough to see the damage from neglect/abuse on next generations and realize a lot of suffering could have been prevented."<br />
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As I spent time with SEKHMET she had me travel back in time with her and see where in fact along with Hekate, she was a driving force in my passion for the marginalized, for the abused and neglected, for how others are treated. She showed me that I fought hard for those and for my own children. Even by staying in the marriage for 30 years I was fighting to right a wrong, but it was not my fight... I was trying to be a Peacemaker in a forest were I could never win the fight.<br />
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What she also revealed to me was that I was out of balance even then. I had too much Guilt from the patriarchal family, church and society I was raised in and it undid all the change I was trying to make in the forest I was living in.<br />
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I love being 62 and having the opportunity to understand how life unfolded so far. I am glad SEKHMET was there with me, because at least in my career as a social worker I did help many make positive changes and I was a part of changes much needed in the community, in families, and even a tad bit in the church.<br />
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But the only way to make a major change in my life was to take my cubs (then adults) and walk out of that destructive marriage forest. It was time for us to find somewhere else to live.<br />
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So that is the story so far. What to glean from this is to Listen and Watch and never take anything for granted. Goddess is always ready to open that door, we have chosen to close, at just the right time.<br />
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Welcome Lionness! Welcome SEKHMET!<br />
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Now time to get to work!<br />
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Blessed be and love! <br />
Sunshine Faehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09978168480125901972noreply@blogger.com3