Saturday, August 9, 2014

A week of Aging!

This past week was interesting to say the least. My Sister and I drove my parents to Pennsylvania so our Mom could visit her Sister, Sister in law and her Nieces. She also wanted to stop by the House she lived in until she was 11, when they moved to Virginia. Her parents moved back to that house after I was born; thus it is the Home that I knew and loved as Gram's house. It was a week of Aging!

My parents are both 81 and Dad just can't and won't (thank goodness) make that long drive anymore (11 hours). My Sister and I are happy to do it and get to see our relatives also. We were all closer to my Mom's side of the Family.

It was a week of Aging and Dying.

My Mom is a Storyteller (much to our chagrin sometimes as she tells the same stories over and over); and so there was much telling of Stories of times Gone by. There was Talk of how the buildings had aged, the vegetation was overgrown and of the people who were now buried deep inside Hays/South Easton Cemetery! (Yes, there was a trip to visit my grand and great grandparents burial places.)

It was a week of Death, Dying and Aging!

And it was a picture of life as we move into that time of More Years behind us then in front of us! Story telling was the theme of the week.

Stories are important. These oral Traditions make sure we have a Container for what has made us who we are. It is a Container full of the Puzzle Pieces that we all struggle to fit together into a coherent picture of Life!

I have two maternal aunts left; one my mom's sister and one her sister-in-law. My mom's sister is in the last stages of Alzheimers. She no longer can tell Stories or even appreciate the ones my Mom tried to tell her. And so we sat around and told stories about her as if she too was buried in the ground along side my grandparents. Alzheimer is a Disease where you Grieve the person's death twice!

My mom's sister-in-law is in a nursing home at 92 years of age and has begged to Die for the last 11 years (since mom's brother died); and yet she is still hanging in there, playing Solitaire and Drinking Vodka...yep at the nursing home! She told lots of Stories although her Memory is getting weaker. Now unable to walk unassisted, she just waits at the nursing home for the "relief of death'.

My Dad had a few "heart episodes" while on the trip and on Friday he sees the cardiologist for the next step after tests before we left. He told my Sister and I that he had said Good Bye to both my Aunts knowing "one of us won't be here this time next year and it may be me."

It was a trip of Aging, Death and Dying!

But it was so much a Trip about Life! We laughed, we told stories, we ate lots of ice cream, we spent a lot of time in the car; we gossiped, we prayed, we bought 8 Shoofly pies at the bakery and we had a good time . We found out that my dad's sister-in-law in Virginia who has terminal cancer was put in the hospital and so there was the talk of what life would look like for his brother who is Aging and not well. They are both in their 90's.

And I was talking about applying for Social Security in the next few months and one of my sister's friends from high school died of brain cancer at age 52.

We got home fine; and while doing laundry and unpacking I began thinking that it is possible that we will be going to a few funerals this year. But isn't that what we all have in common? One day we will all face the whole Aging, Death and Dying time of our lives! 

Just like the Trees of the forest, the Animals, the fish and Mamma Earth Her very Self! And come Monday, even the Moon Goddess will begin to Disappear and Die in the Sky. BUT She teaches us that what ever happens there is fullness after every Death; whether that is physical, emotional, or spiritual.

So as I gaze at Grandmother Moon in all her fullness I will give thanks for the Light each of these people have brought into my life. I will cherish the Memories, the Stories, and all the times we will have together until the Quietness of Death calls each of us Home! And I will even appreciate Mom's Stories as it is the Container that holds the pieces for the Puzzle of my Life!

And it is all Good! So let's just celebrate when we can!

Love and Light!


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. I enjoyed reading about your trip to Pa. What a positive attitude you have on ageing. I also like your final note about enjoying and celebrating the life we have I try to celebrate each moment of goodness every day. Simple things like hot coffee, watering the flowers are cherished and a smile from a friend or relative brings me joy.

    1. Thank you for coming on my trip Cheryl! I too try to appreciate and enjoy the life I have left now. Some days are harder than others! You bring light into my life!