Shadow Visits!

Shadow knocked on the Door to my Heart!

I turned on the TV!
Once Upon a Time
Believe
Revenge

Shadow knocked on the Door to my Brain!

I turned on music!
Washed my face
Brushed my teeth
Put on my PJs
Climbed under the covers

Shadow knocked on the Door of my Dreams!
Bathroom
Balcony
Back to bed

Shadow knocked on the Door of my Awakening!
Morning News on
Shower
Make up
Hair done
Breakfast
Work

Shadow stopped knocking

Today as I took my morning walk in the Forest and to the Lake, Shadow slipped into my Mind and Heart as I was no where to be distracted from Her Knocking. She did not wait for me to invite her in!

Shadow said, "Good morning my sweet Goddess. Did you not hear my knocking this week? Did you choose to ignore me? Were you afraid of what I would be asking you to look at; to visit with; to say good bye to? Did you not hear my knocking this week?"

I kept walking and looked back over my week. Did not I not hear Her knocking? I realized I was having a great week and so maybe I didn't want to have Shadow visit me.

Shadow said, "I have come to say Good bye! I have come to say I am the last of the Shadows. I have come to release you from looking behind you and wondering when the next Shadow would come for a visit. You my dear have visited with, made peace with and dismissed all the Shadows that dwelt within you.  That is the reason you have felt such peace lately. I am the last Shadow to visit you."

Shadow said, "You no longer have visits from Shame, Confusion, Regret and Anger. You no longer have visits from the Embarrassment of your choices. You no longer sit with the Shadow of Failed Motherhood, Failed Wife, Failed Daughter. You have said good bye to the 'Failed' and 'not enough' Shadows that plagued you for so long. You have dismissed "my body is not perfect, my brain not smart and my health questionable' Shadows."

Shadow said, "In doing so, you understand that you do not 'need' someone to save you from the sinful nature you were born with because you were not born 'sinful'. You have embraced the understanding that you are a goddess with the ability to heal, teach, love, be passionate, conquer, travel, dream, be alone, and so forth and so on. You have embraced who you are, what you need and don't need. You are now able to not take responsibility for  another's journey but are able to walk with them when invited and leave the journey when it is time.

"And so," said Shadow "I take my leave. I am the Shadow that sent all the Shadows to you. I am the Shadow of the Light and Love; of Acceptance and Embracing; of the Moon, the Sun, the Stars, the Grasses, the animals and the very Air that you breathe. For you see, my dear goddess, Shadows are not dark and monstrous. You made them to be because that was familiar. Shadows are always there to help you make sense of that which makes no sense. You have done the work and you have released your own Self by listening to Your Own Voice."

I was at the Lake by this time, and stopped to build an altar of stones. It is freeing to know I have done what I need to do to no longer have to reside in that place of Shadow work. I am now free to use the passion and the knowledge learned from those visits to be a presence in the world where I am called to be. I can choose what issues are important to me and speak on them. I can choose who is in my life and who is not. I can choose...me, healthy, beautiful, incredible, magickal ME!

And so, I thanked this last Shadow for all She had done in my life. And She Left.

May you be willing to sit with the Shadows and not see them as monsters but as friends who are there to help you become free of them!

Blessed be and much love!

Life after Death?

So, my older cousins were visiting my parents last week. They are Mormons. An interesting religion indeed and we have had many many conversations around what they believe, how they worship and where they think they go after they die. That was when I was a Christian.

Since leaving the Christian Tradition, they have not seemed to want to ask me questions or have discussions around what I now believe, so I was not in the conversation they had with my Mom about what happens after we die.

On my walk yesterday, I began really thinking about what I Believe Happens after I take my last Breath in this Garden. When I was a Christian, I had problems with the whole: we die and our soul goes to live with Jesus where we wait until Judgement Day. You see even all those years I had a struggle with the whole "Judgement Day" concept. When I left that Tradition, I spoke of Summerland and of Reincarnation, Past Lives, etc. There was still this belief that something is Next for me when I take my last Breath.

On my walk, it hit me how as Human Beings we spend most of our life trying to keep Death at Bay. We try so hard to Stay in this Garden no matter how good or bad our Lives are Here cause the thought of "Death" is just too much to handle I guess. So we make up Stories as to what lies in the Beyond. We speak of beautiful fields to run in, or banquet tables, or singing with angels, or waiting to be put into another body but while waiting we get to walk down golden paved roads and sing and dance! And really if that makes Letting go of the Fear of Dying then that is Wonderful.

Ok, so I asked myself, "Self, where do you stand on this issue of what happens After?"

I stopped, looked around and Knew that I Knew that I Knew that I no longer Think about the Afterlife. I don't Choose how I Live because one Day there will be this Judgement Day and I will have to explain all my Actions to the Divine.

Nope, I don't dwell in the Unknown any  more. And that is Comforting to me. I really don't care what happens after I take my last Breath of the Air in this Garden. What I realized is that thinking and worrying about the Afterlife only uses Energy that we are to Use here in This Life; whether it is the Only or the One of Many. Some External Story of Facing god has so many all tied up that they can't do the Good that we are to do Here and Now.

But you see, telling People that there is this Judgement Day is a part of the Power and Control. You see, it is all about realizing that we are horrible people really, full of sin, and the only way to not have more of the terrible painful life we already have when we die (i.e. hell), is to go by the rules/doctrine/dogma of the religion and be Saved! The Leaders, dead or alive, of the "religion" have the answers, have the direct conversation with the Deity in question so you are either in or out which means always thinking about what happens afterwards and if you will pass the Judgement Test when you get there.

Way too much Energy spent on the Unknown, if you ask me. But that is just me.

There are lots of Promises made about the Hereafter: rejoining Relatives who have gone before us; seeing the beloved Pets that went before us too; and most of all we will not have to come back Here to this Painful, Horrible Place called Earth.

What a Shame really. Maybe if we all paid more attention to what it means "To Do No Harm," Earth wouldn't be such a Terrible Place to live. Maybe if we really took care of the Garden then we wouldn't have so many Dis-eases. Maybe, just maybe, if we Gave Up all Power and Control and looked at our Neighbor with non-judgmental eyes; coveting what they have or hating what they have that we don't have or we don't like; Maybe Just Maybe we would be Happy and Contented and not have to spend money we don't have to gather Stuff all around us which we can't take with us anyway. But most of all Maybe there would be no more Hunger, no more Poverty, no more Abuse and Neglect.

So, that's the answer I would have given to my Cousins and my Parents. What do I believe happens when I die? I really don't Care because I am living the Best I can right now. I am Caring for my Neighbor with what I have and I am Speaking up for those Without a Voice who "religion" has convinced they have to give them all their Money so this Afterlife will be one bang up Party! I just don't spend the Energy Thinking About What is Going to Happen.

You see, I only have so much Energy, and I want to use it Drinking in every bit of the Gifts from the Goddess! I want to use my Energy to hug a co-worker who has been demeaned by a vindictive and hurtful Manager at work. I want to use my Energy, loving my Kids, loving my Family, loving my Facebook Friends, sending Cards, walking in the Forest, Hooping, etc etc etc.

Yep....I got too much to do Here to worry about There!

And I do like Surprises!

Blessed be! 

Creation Story I can get behind!

"The Ancient Ones told humanity that it is our job to care for the animals and all the kingdoms of nature, the Grandmothers say. In the creation myths of the Grandmother's traditions, it is said that in the beginning, wisdom and knowledge were gained from the animals, that the Creator did not speak directly to humanity. He showed himself through the beasts. Through observing all the kingdoms of nature and the stars and the sun and the moon, humanity was to humbly learn how to live on this planet. Everything on Earth was created for a purpose. for every disease there was a cure in the plant kingdom, and every person was born with a mission, the Grandmothers say." (GRANDMOTHERS COUNSEL THE WORLD Women Elders Offer Their Vision For Our Planet; Carol Schaefer, pg 163)

The Creator, or rather Creatress as I prefer, was silent. She did not speak directly to humanity.

How different from the Biblical Creation Story where this Male God is doing a lot of talking. This God speaks and everything comes into being because he speaks it into being. Then he lays down the rules to humanity and ultimately he speaks the words that throw humanity out of the garden and into toil and trouble. But before he throws them out he gives the man "dominion" (power and control) over everything God Spoke into being.

How's that working out? I think it is not!

But in the Ancient Ones creation myths the One who is Creating does not speak to humanity, but expects that humanity will "learn" by watching, observing, participating with the rest of the Garden; particularly the animals. It is a gentle creation story, don't you think?

"The Creation story of Grandmother Agnes's people, which is similar to many other indigenous people's creations stories, states that the Creator created men and women to take care of His Creation, which was why He was giving them a brain and with that brain the power to reason. The Creator gave us our gifts to be a voice for the voiceless, Grandmother Agnes explains. Humans were told to use all the gifts of nature in moderation and to keep all things in balance." (pg 164)

But as we know this did not happen. Man uses his brain for power and control, destruction and war, hate and abuse. And the Earth is crying out for us to be Her Voice! The Animals are begging for us to be their Voice. The Water is drowning in Her own filth and needs the Voice that we were given.

We have forgotten to look for the lessons, to sit and watch animals who teach us how to live in community; how to only take that which is needed to survive on a daily basis. We are now lost. We no longer know and it is hurting us all!

The Shift is here. So many of us have rediscovered how to watch and learn; how to be silent; and most of all how to Speak for the Voiceless!

I prefer this Creation Story if there has to be one. Really, it doesn't make any difference how all this was Created, what makes a difference to me is that I leave where ever I walk better than how I found it. What makes a difference is how often I close my mouth and just watch and listen.

And you know what? The Goddess would create in this way; not the Male god of the Bible. The Goddess would create in Silence; would ask humanity to stop, look, listen and learn. The Goddess would ask us to Care For not Dominate animals, the winged ones, the one-legged, the two legged, the water ones and all else in the Garden. She would not set up a bunch of rules for humanity to go by and She certainly would not throw us out of Her beautiful garden.

So, there is much for us to do to change the narrative of the predominate patriarchal myths. May we all join our hearts and tell a new story! Blessed be. Oh and while you are at it; Grandmothers Counsel The World is a most satisfying and motivating read! Take the time to do so!

Aho and love!